Split Second

For if we live, we live for the Lord, and if we die, we die for the Lord; so then, whether we live or die, we are the Lord's. Romans 14:8

It was my intention to write about the Sacraments today. I created an outline, typed one opening paragraph, did a quick mental outline, searched for some quotes. Then, I got up and did something else. I reviewed the opening sentences decided to do something else. So I then typed another opening paragraph. I looked at it. Then I decided to run an errand.

And so I went to the bank. Since it was early, it was quiet. There was one man and one woman in front of me. The man had a cellphone with a large screen. He kept aiming it all around the bank, taking photographs. He photographed the names on the door, the teller stations, the counters. He was non-threatening but my early morning mind instantly imagined the worse. When he slid his hand into the pocket of his gray sweatpants I knew that he was not going to pull out a gun but for a split second I asked myself what if he did pull out a gun.

Such is the the state of the world and our society. Fear and mistrust wait for us. The events at Fort Hood have left me feeling uneasy and vulnerable. I think we need to offer our prayers for both the victims and the shooter. I think we need to offer our prayers for all our soldiers and their families who have been deployed to either war zone.

There is no way for us to know what thoughts or fears lead people to action. Our only response should first be to God. We must offer our prayers to God and ask God for guidance, compassion, and mercy for all.

Then let us no longer judge one another, but rather resolve never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother. Romans 14:13

All people live within an unique sphere created by truth, facts, and opinion. The combination of these three elements can create perspective. What leads one man to shoot and kill one person might lead another to prayer and service to God. There probably is that split second when everything is quickly considered, when everything is decided right before the action. I think we should pray that if someone reaches that point, that they stop and ask themselves what would Jesus do?

Each day I try to temper what I do and what I say. I try to have fairness and goodness be my guide. There are moments when I am able to be humble, compassionate, merciful. But, I must always work at it, focus on obeying Christ’s teachings. Each day I try to live for God. Some days it is easier than others.

And there are split seconds when I have to make decisions. I try to put God first. I am not always successful. But, I keep trying. I have to remind myself that I am human and that I am not perfect.

Then I try goodness again; trying imitating Christ again.

And again and again.


Keep the faith (that) you have to yourself in the presence of God; blessed is the one who does not condemn himself for what he approves. Romans 14:22

Mystery

November 5, 2009.--The relation of prayer to spiritual growth filled my mind with all types of images and statements as I walked down Connecticut Avenue to the Cathedral. Love creates an infinite set of formulas and set of rules within each of us. Prayer remains very essential to our spiritual life. Prayer is one way for us to communicate to God or for God to communicate to us.

I give myself a little prayer or a simple thought, to think about, to play with each day. I like having something mildly cerebral to focus the thoughts of my rambunctious mind; my imagination needs some question, real or rhetorical to cling to, to tease, to define; the clinging on often leads to more thoughts about mercy, compassion, and hope. Sometimes I am able to develop a deeper understanding of God or my love for God.

The more real that God becomes in my heart and soul the easier it becomes for me notice sin. Sin is a coarsened behavior, either thought or action. I sometimes wonder whether the impetus for sin begins somewhere within the unconscious within the fragments of dreams, fantasies, nightmares and other fears. How we interpret our sins might provide us with tools and resources to avoid them in the future.

Do I consider sin to be concrete, abstract, or some type of rebellion against the conscience? I am still trying to decide. Each day I am trying to avoid sin. There are good hours, and bad minutes.

Life is a condensation of all of our thoughts, all of our actions, all of our deeds, the ones we planned, the ones we completed. Within all of us there are an infinite number of thoughts and truths. This is how we advance and grow by learning, asking more and more questions.

Our thoughts, our imagination provides us with an incalculable wealth of symbols and ideas. Our lives as Christian needs to have access and control over our thoughts, our imagination. They both need to be always focused on goodness, fairness, mercy and directed toward God.

Many of my dreams are forgotten each morning when I wake. Many of my daydreams are repeated with slight variations each day. The conscious mind is often a Byzantine enterprise of mazes and dead end hallways and mirrored rooms and all types of other adjective and noun combinations.

There is mystery in the conscious mind; there is mystery in the unconscious. If we except both of those statements then can we also accept that within each action that a human makes there is a mystery; there is always a question why? This question occurs with every action, good or bad, sinning or loving God. This question leads us to reason, a deeper understanding of ourselves, our actions. Our relationship with God deepens when we learn and express more humility, charity, and love within our lives.

The mystery within our minds allows and encourages spontaneity. Hope and goodness are often supported and strengthened by some act unexpected, sudden, yet very beautiful. Our spiritual lives are neither scripted nor planned. Our progress is based upon our efforts, our prayers, our hope and how we interact with our Church community. Our individual progress might not be the same as our neighbors. It does not have to be. It should not be.

We often repeat what we pray for and how we pray for it. Our prayers exists with our thoughts, our dreams. Our prayers are sometimes spontaneous. Our prayers are always necessary.

My Three P's

I am absent-minded these days. I must admit that I have always been a little absent-minded. I forget to write letters, return phone calls, answer emails. My mind is always filled with all types of things books I want to see, music I want to listen to, people I want to visit, food I want to eat. But, to achieve any of those things, some action by me is needed.

My mind frequently explores the connection of pastoralism, philosophy, and predilection in my personal faith development. This morning I have played with their individual meanings and created a simple confection which will cause me to revisit and reevaluate these statements. Such is life! Such is spiritual development. There will always be questions both asked and unasked, prayers well formed and prayers rushed and incomplete. I am learning to sprinkle faith on everything.

My conception of spiritual life has these very words with there very distinct definitions woven into one very thick strand. My spiritual life needs pastoralism, needs philosophy, needs predilection.

Pastoralism provides the tools to grow and protect a Christian life which contains love, hope, fairness and which is giving and peaceful. Pastoralism reminds me to keep humility, charity, mercy in my heart and to share them unconditionally with everyone.

Philosophy provides the great rhetorical questions which can make me peevish if I consider them too long in the vacuum of the infinite. Questions about why I do this or that, how I feel about this or that provide a glimpse into my true being. I learn more about my humanity when I analyze my behavior with acquaintances, friends, and other strangers. Within my philosophy resides a basic curiosity. Within my philosophy resides a basic belief in order. Within my philosophy resides my basic belief in God. My philosophy retains the childish enthusiasm and never ending question creating tools.

It is my curiosity which leads me closer to God; it is my curiosity which questions what is in my heart and soul; it is my curiosity which encourages me to give goodness a chance; it is my curiosity which encourages and fuels my hope. And my philosophy uses this information to move me closer toward God, to strengthen my belief in God.

My predilection for being Christian and following in the footsteps of Christ is influenced by the pastoralism and philosophy within my life. Each day there is a reason to pray, to give thanks, to remember God’s goodness. For my life to have meaning, it must have direction. It must have motion. My heart and soul must be working together to help me do the right thing, be the humble, obedient servant of God. For my life to have meaning I must accept and protect the desire to place God in the position of supreme importance in my life. My life is not my life. It is God’s life. It is God’s will.

Each choice that I make should reflect that simple belief.

More about Sunday

November 3, 2009.--I am proud at the incredible traditions of Judaism that helped created Christianity. I am happy to hear the Redeemer’s parables and teachings. I will always like the Beatitudes.

The Beatitudes challenge us to behave in a manner that shows concern and love for our neighbor as well as for ourselves. The Beatitudes challenge the modern vogue idea of the individual. The Beatitudes are simple instructions for living and flourishing within God’s community.

Please remember to include the Beatitudes in your daily life. Kindness and goodness will surprise you when you do.

Hope is a large part of our belief in God.

I think that we live in a time of moral difficulty. We live in time where vice is encouraged, glamorized and accepted as the norm. The laxity of modern society allows for all authority to be challenged, ridiculed. Man needs rules, he needs laws. We need to know what is acceptable and what is not acceptable.

Humanity does not exist to serve the whims of Madison Avenue. The richness of our Christian lives exists beyond the Hollywood formula and variations. Eternal life requires a belief and trust and love for a higher authority. Eternal life requires fulfilling promises to God.

I am always amazed at the examples of God’s love that I observe while going about my daily life. People helping each other, being respectful of each other.

Our religion is truly based upon a foundation of love. As believers we must constantly reinforce this foundation.

The Beatitudes provide this foundation in their directness, in their simplicity. They are an appeal to each and every one us to live rich lives of fairness, faith, hope, humility. and charity.

How we use them remains our personal choice. I like to think of them as flash cards. As I go through my daily routine, depending on what I am doing or not doing, my mind will flash “Blessed are those who mourn” or “Blessed are the peacemakers”.

Nestling within me, within my heart and soul is a desire to live a faithful obedient Christian life. The Beatitudes will help me with that.

Thinking About Sunday

November 2, 2009.--Yesterday, Sunday, I listened to and later read through verses from Revelations,
and the gospels of St. John and St. Matthew. The text was filled with imagery to teach and to inspire. “Salvation comes from our God, who is seated on the throne, and from the Lamb.” Revelations reminds us. Last week while researching iconography and art associated with the church I read this chapter. Hearing it read aloud helped me to revisit my perception of God and his followers. The image of the Faithful and the sacrifices that are necessary, pain, distress, confusion are inevitable. But our belief in Jesus Christ provides hope and a path to follow. Our belief in Jesus Christ provides both instruction and inspiration. Our belief in Jesus Christ provides us with a simple way of living and being which when faithfully followed will lead us to heaven. Like the warm rays of a June sunrise, God’s love is prismatic and creates new and individual responses in all of us as we accept or not accept it, as we rest in it, as we find ways to share it with others who need it. And that is the true reason that we are Christians. Our lives should always reflect our love and belief in God. The message of Christ must be repeated and shared by each and everyone of us who believes. The message of Christ must be taught to all generations, young and old, as lessons to encourage intrinsic goodness and as lessons to challenge blindly living lives of current fashions, current trends, and ancient corruption, ancient sin. Often, psychiatry, science, and self help books have relegated sin away from the hearts and minds of men. Sin seems to only exist only in the murderer or terrorist or anyone opposed to our beliefs. Please do not let sin win this earthly battle and lead you into a de facto life of confusion, complacency. Please understand that we are all sinners, that we will struggle with the fact that we are sinners each day of our lives, and that we will ask God for forgiveness. We must remember to request forgiveness for ourselves, we must remember to offer forgiveness to others. Christianity exists beyond the sacred texts, Christianity exists within the hearts and minds of the believers. Christianity exists within each and everyone of us. If we are lucky, our hearts and souls will create a fertile, nurturing space for Christianity to grow and flourish within our lives.

We must always remember to pray to God and to give him thanks.

Human life is always going to be a time of uneasiness and struggle. Believing in God makes it just a little easier and provides hope.

Touched and Touched Again by the Spirit

All Saints Day - Holy Days of Obligation - November 1, 2009

It was of him that the prophet Isaiah had spoken when he said: "A voice of one crying out in the desert, 'Prepare the way of the Lord, make straight his paths.'" Matthew 3:3

There is a brilliancy in the design and actions of the Church. There is a beautifulness in the simple projection of God’s love, mercy, and compassion. There is a distinctness in the traditions and the re-interpretations of the traditions by the priests. There is an axis of Faith with both the Liturgy of the Word and the Liturgy of the Eucharist providing hope and guidance. The pastoralism of the Catholic Church is symmetrical and alive in everyone of us. Our Baptism begun our individual distinct pastoralism.

There is a straightness of connection between the Church and God which should not be downplayed, can not be forgotten. The world needs to be reminded of this loving, gentle connection, this nurturing, luminous relationship between God and his believers.

The moment we walk into Mass we become part of the Catholic Church’s living pastoralism. Our actions, both individual and collective, suggest the beautiful mystery of each of our spiritual lives. Our actions present our witness to our belief and faith in God. Our actions are a mixture of love, hope, obedience, faith, humility, charity, mercy and so many other things which produce goodness.

Spiritual life and spiritual guidance both are always on display and both are amazingly frequently non-verbal, silent moments to be glanced, or watched momentarily. They ask only for our respect. For me one of the most powerful moments occurs when I see people praying in front of the Blessed Sacrament. Whether it is one person or ten, the prayers, sometimes with rosaries, sometimes without, remain personal, private. They are between God and the individuals, sometimes kneeling, sometimes seated with their heads bowed.

Our spiritual guidance extends beyond the homily to how we interact within the Church community. Our regular Church attendance is a good start. But the more we volunteer and participate in the various committees and ministries the more our spiritual lives as Catholics will grow and radiate through our daily deeds and actions. Being Christian is based upon truisms and commandments which instruct us to simplify our lives, be humble, be meek, love one another.

Too often we allow ourselves to interpret and associate our Christian lives within the specific church and the specific time when we worship together as a community. Too often we allow our secular lives filled with instant gratification and bad grammar to challenge the simple commandment to love one another.

We live in a time when each and every Catholic needs to bear witness to the beauty, grace, and love of God.

"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat (or drink), or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing? Matthew 6:25

Minute by Minute, Almost

I shall try to reconstruct some of my personal events of this day.

On paper this was going to be a busy Sunday. I planned to be an Altar Server and then assist with Hospitality Sunday at my parish and then attend another Mass at another parish and learn how to be a sacristan there.

I arrived and for a brief moment I thought that I was late because Mass was going on. Since Daylight Savings had only hours before moved an hour somewhere else, for a second or two I feared the worse and imagined that I had overslept. Then, the old brain began to listen and I recognized the somber Stewardship appeal. I hastened to the sacristy, changed, and waited for my assignment.

There is always activity in the sacristy before Mass. There are always questions and answers. There is also prayer. Yesterday, after lining up and waiting for the procession to begin and before the choir began there was a beautiful moment when I prayed love universal and unconditional.

I enjoyed the Mass itself. I enjoyed being reminded to bear witness.

After Mass I helped out with Hospitality Sunday. I mainly talked with friends and introduced one young woman who was interested in the Homeless Ministry to one of that program’s leaders. Then, I circulated, smiled, spoke, smiled, spoke, emptied the tiny trash can filled with the tiny plastic empty coffee creamers, empty paper sugar packets, paper napkins, and stirrers. I did not drink coffee. I tried to avoid eating a donut.

And then one of my friends that I met at the Homeless Ministry saw me and reminded me that I had not given him his housewarming present yet. He had some coffee and donuts and sat down.

I then decided to help with the Hospitality at the next Mass. Moments later I decided to attend the Organ Concert. And then the doorbell sounded. People interested in another ministry arrived and I was helping to move some chairs from a conference room into the hallway for them to sit down.

After the next Mass the room was filled with people, young old, children and adults. Trays of donuts were being emptied quickly and carried into the kitchen and refilled. I was trying to keep the pitchers of orange juice and water on two tables located near the rear of the room filled. It was amazing. How great it seeing all these people and trying to navigate around them. How great it was to see the children waiting for the orange juice.

And then I raced upstairs to attend the Organ concert. How beautiful the music sounded. I am still amazed that the organ is incomplete and more work still needs to be done on the pipes.

Later, with a hint of approaching exhaustion, I rallied and walked across the bridge to the other parish. I arrived and listened to the instructions about pre-Mass preparation and set-up.